Echo

Interview #10 – Sharon aka Echo

We sat down at the diner, both anxious to start munching on some french fries!

A concerned look washed over her face, “I’ve just had a lot of health problems,” she said. “Not abuse and things like some of the other people you’ve talked you.”

I explained to her that I’m not a reporter seeking out a horrible story. I just want truth and there’s no doubt that some of the challenges she’s faced are being dealt with by others who could use some hope.

At a young age Sharon was diagnosed with Marfan syndrome which negatively affects the bodies connective tissues. It causes a plethora of dangerous physical problems that can result in sudden death due to an aortic rupture. Because of the severity of this syndrome Sharon was told she would be unable to do many things. No one wants their life choices to be made for them. She felt powerless. As she got older her medical issues intensified. Doctor after doctor told her that she probably could not, and definitely should not have children. At the least she would pass her health problems onto them, at the most she would likely die. She was devastated. She had dreamt of one day being a mother and now those dreams were shattered. When she was 20 years old she got her tubes tied. She felt it would’ve been too dangerous and much too selfish to try and bring a child into the world under those conditions. She is now thankful for all the opportunities she’s had that would not have been afforded to her if she’d had children.

At the very young age of 29 she had heart surgery. It was starting to make sense to me why she was so concerned with healthy foods, medicines and methods. The few conversations Sharon and I have had previously dealt with her habits of eating organic unprocessed foods, seeing homeopathic doctors and making her own herbal medicines. She reminds me a bit of the intriguing lady living in the woods that you stumble upon when you’re weak and lost and then she has you drink a concoctions and you’re magically well! She claims she hates technology and could live without electricity so maybe she will be that lady one day!

Now, as we all know, dating often sucks. It can suck away our sense of self, our joy and our will to live if we are not with the right person. After the delightful honeymoon phase things can make a turn for the worse. Sharon spoke about a particularly difficult past relationship. She was manipulated and controlled until she began to think everything was her fault and she thought she may be going crazy. Hearing her describe that relationship brought to mind a very serious method of manipulation and grooming that some controlling individuals use against their partners in order for them to be completely needed. It is referred to as, Gaslighting. “Gaslighting is the systematic attempt by one person to erode another’s reality. This is done by telling them that what they are experiencing isn’t so - and, the gradual giving up on the part of the other person.” –Stern. It is very challenging to break free of such severe mental control but Sharon is an incredibly strong woman. She allowed herself to get out of the relationship and regain control of her life with the help of cognitive behavioral therapy and family support.

Sharon is a tremendous example of what courage, self-awareness and determination can result in. I have always been a deeply empathetic person and when I’m involved in these one on one interviews I strongly feel the emotions that are pulsing through the person in front of me. She is STRONG! Her convictions are solid, her self worth is excellent and I felt empowered just being in her presence. When asked what comes to mind when she thinks of courage she said, “Living! Not hiding behind our struggles and using them as an excuse to be a victim but choosing to live!” Sharon also wants to encourage us all to trust ourselves and listen within. She is certain that answers we seek our inside ourselves. We just have to listen and trust. She has overcome remarkable odds in her life and is standing strong and capable of almost anything today. I’m going to take her advice and hope I can get the same amazing results she’s gotten! Thank you for your courage. Thank you for choosing to live!